Most of us have moments where we think, Why did I say that? or Part of me wants to move forward, but another part is holding back. These inner conflicts can be frustrating, confusing, and even painful. But what if those “parts” of you aren’t signs that something is wrong but instead, clues to how your system is trying to protect and support you?
Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a therapeutic approach based on the idea that we all have many different parts within us and that each one has a reason for being there. Some parts carry pain from the past, while others work hard to keep that pain tucked away. Some parts get angry, some numb out, some take charge, and some retreat. All of them are trying, in their own way, to help us get through life. And when we start listening to them—not judging or silencing them—we can begin to understand ourselves in a whole new way.
At the center of it all is what IFS calls the Self. This is the calm, curious, compassionate core that’s never been broken, damaged, or lost—no matter what you’ve been through. Therapy isn’t about getting rid of your parts. It’s about creating space for your Self to lead, so your parts don’t have to work so hard to protect you all the time. When they begin to trust that they’re no longer alone and that there’s a deeper, steadier presence guiding the way, they can begin to relax. And that’s when real healing happens.
IFS isn’t about labeling your experience or fixing you. It’s about building a respectful, curious relationship with your inner world. Even the parts you wish you didn’t have, especially those, have something important to say. They often carry old burdens, inherited beliefs, or memories that were too much to handle at the time. As those burdens begin to lift, people often describe feeling more ease, more clarity, and a deeper sense of wholeness, not because they became someone new, but because they reconnected with who they’ve always been underneath the pain.
While I’m not Level 1 trained in IFS, I completed the IFS Online Circle: Foundations of the IFS Model, a comprehensive training that taught me the fundamentals of this powerful modality. This foundation allows me to integrate IFS-informed concepts and interventions into our work together—helping clients get to know their parts, understand their internal patterns, and connect more deeply with their Self. Whether you’re curious about how IFS might support your healing, or you’re just starting to explore what it means to turn inward with compassion, this approach offers a gentle, empowering path toward self-discovery.
If you’ve ever felt like you’re at war with yourself, or like different sides of you are pulling in opposite directions, you’re not alone. IFS offers a way to make peace with those parts—not by forcing them into silence, but by listening with care. Healing doesn’t have to mean getting rid of anything. Sometimes, it means welcoming every part of you home.
